Everyone says that age is just a number, and that you can do anything you want as long as you feel as though you’re young at heart. And like I’ve said, everyone says it but, generally speaking, people rarely believe it. An even bigger rarity are those who actually both preach it and live it. I can now proudly say that I am one of those proud human beings, and I’m not ashamed of it one bit! And why should I be? After all, this motto gave me something I thought I would never have again – love.
When I lost my husband I thought that my whole world was destroyed beyond repair. In some ways it was, at least one part of it. But that most important part, the part that always finds a way to survive even with the smallest bit of hope, wasn’t. Although my brain wishes it had this knowledge back then, my heart knows that I needed to go through the heartache; I needed to be clueless and hopeless in order to truly appreciate everything amazing that happened to me later on. We live and we learn, and it amazes me how I get surprised by life’s little antics even in my 70s. And the things that I’ve learned in the last ten years are as valuable to me as they would have been to someone in their twenties.
My husband and I were married for 50 years. Shocking, isn’t it? Young people nowadays tend to perceive marriage as a thing of convenience; they often discard it as a malfunctioning appliance – they know they can return it if it doesn’t serve them and get something else instead. They don’t put much emphasis on its longevity, either. Don’t get me wrong; if you try to make something work but it just continues to annoy you like an ill-fitted shoe then, by all means, return it and try to give it more thought on your next shopping adventure. But don’t expect a piece of paper to solve all of you problems and then throw it all away just because you didn’t get everything you wanted at the very start of it all. Marriage is a partnership, and as all great partnerships, it asks for complete and utter devotion from all parties interested. Back in my day, when we said “I do” we knew we were making a life-long commitment.
That’s why I felt like I was about to die as well after my husband’s passing – we were in it for life, and he had left me to live out my days alone. My partner, my best friend, the father of my children, and the love of my life was dead. I knew we were not exactly in our prime, but I genuinely thought that we had ten more good years ahead of us. What was I supposed to do after his passing? I was confused, heartbroken, and depressed, and nothing I did made me feel better… at least not until my grandkids showed me a little site called Young At Heart Singles.
This blog site brought a lot of joy back into my life, and if I were to say that it didn’t rejuvenate me I would be lying. I wasn’t looking for relationships or hookups (as my grandkids call it); I just wanted a friend and a companion. I wanted someone who went through the same things as me so there wouldn’t be any pressure to replace anyone.
Miraculously enough, I managed to surround myself (at least my virtual self) with people just like that – with people who had seen it all, been through it all, and who were happy to give some dating advice and tips. Of course I still love my husband and I will miss him right until the moment I see him again, but I’m aware that the time we have on this planet is precious. I need to feel alive while I’m alive. This online community taught me that.